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Post by Violetta on May 30, 2002 19:28:35 GMT 9.5
I just downloaded MSN Messenger last night so Portoholic and I could send instant messages to each other when we are online. If any of you have the software and would like to be added to my contact list, email me at admin@thepowerfromport.com with your hotmail address and I'll add you to the list. You may not want to post it here, because it could fall into the hands of spammers.
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Post by Mark on Aug 5, 2002 19:07:11 GMT 9.5
Right now mine is working keep getting server errors is anybody having the same problem.
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Post by Violetta on Aug 5, 2002 19:35:51 GMT 9.5
It's just started working now Portoholic.
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Post by dreamkillers on Aug 7, 2002 0:25:49 GMT 9.5
Well it's reliable as most Microsoft products........ Maybe we should keep this thread going with everyone's best Microsoft jokes......... Bill Gates vs. GM For all of us who feel only the deepest love and affection for the way computers have enhanced our lives: At a recent computer exposition (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If General Motors had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon." In response to Bill's comments, GM issued a press release stating: If General Motors had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics: 1- For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day. 2- Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car. 3- Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason, you would simply accept this. 4- Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine. 5- MacIntosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive -- but would run on only 5% of the roads. 6- The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "General Protection Fault" warning light. 7- The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying. 8- Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna. 9- Every time GM introduced a new car, car buyers would have to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car. 10- You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off. next.......
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Post by dreamkillers on Aug 14, 2002 13:14:11 GMT 9.5
Bill Gates Goes to Hell
Eventually Bill dies and goes to St Peter... St Peter is embarrased.
"I don't know what to do with you Bill ... you put a PC in every household ... on the other hand you made windows 95. So I tell you what ... just chose between heaven and hell"
Bill goes "Really, I can chose?"
"Yes pick one" Peter says.
Bill who is very professionnal: "Ok, can I visit both before deciding?"
"Ok, just go's on. What do you want to start with?"
Bill: "... why not start with hell?"
And then they both went to hell.
Magnificient. Great beaches, plenty sun and naked women every where, smiling at Bill.
"That looks wonderfull" Bill says. Now how about heaven?
Then then went to heaven. Magnificient. Great beaches, plenty sun, just no naked women
"Ok" Bill says, "I pick hell then."
After a week St Peter decided to visit Bill who was sent to Hell The poor guy was on the floor, screaming, scratching the ground with his nails. He shouted at St Peter: "No no no! I Can't stand it no more!"
"What's wrong" St Peter asked?
Bill goes "I don't understand, there is nothing to do with what I saw the first time" "Where is the beach? The naked women?"
And St Peter: "That was just a demo.
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Post by Violetta on Aug 14, 2002 14:16:27 GMT 9.5
Hehe and it serves him right too! LOL ;D
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Post by dreamkillers on Aug 23, 2002 21:22:38 GMT 9.5
An oldie but a goodie.......
The world's smartest man......
One night, a Delta twin-engine puddle jumper was flying somewhere above New Jersey. There were five people on board: the pilot, Michael Jordan, Bill Gates, the Dali Lama, and a hippie. Suddenly, an illegal oxygen generator exploded loudly in the luggage compartment, and the passenger cabin began to fill with smoke. The cockpit door opened, and the pilot burst into the compartment.
"Gentlemen," he began, "I have good news and bad news. The bad news is that we're about to crash in New Jersey. The good news is that there are four parachutes, and I have one of them!" With that, the pilot threw open the door and jumped from the plane.
Michael Jordan was on his feet in a flash. "Gentlemen," he said, "I am the world's greatest athlete. The world needs great athletes. I think the world's greatest athlete should have a parachute!" With these words, he grabbed one of the remaining parachutes, and hurtled through the door and into the night.
Bill Gates rose and said, "Gentlemen, I am the world's smartest man. The world needs smart men. I think the world's smartest man should have a parachute, too." He grabbed one, and out he jumped.
The Dali Lama and the hippie looked at one another. Finally, the Dali Lama spoke. "My son," he said, "I have lived a satisfying life and have known the bliss of True Enlightenment. You have your life ahead of you; you take a parachute, and I will go down with the plane."
The hippie smiled slowly and said, "Hey, don't worry, dude. The world's smartest man just jumped out wearing my backpack."
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Hoggy
New Member
Good Grief
Posts: 10
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Post by Hoggy on Nov 1, 2002 13:29:54 GMT 9.5
Meh, I don't care.
slinky_squid84@hotmail.com
Anyone that wants to add a Collingwood fan that has a liking for the Port Magpies can add me.
Believe me! I went to the North v Port game this year! I took photos, they are still waiting to be scanned Violetta! My computer's down at the moment, using the local library's one so when it gets working I shall email.
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Post by Violetta on Nov 2, 2002 19:48:49 GMT 9.5
Hi Hoggy I added you to my MSN. Thanks for the photos offer too. I look forward to seeing the pics you took.
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Post by powerfan on Nov 3, 2002 10:17:43 GMT 9.5
Hi Hoggy
I have added you also I think I tried anyhow
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Post by koulagirl22 on Nov 3, 2002 18:25:12 GMT 9.5
Just added you as well. Pleased to meet you and all.
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Post by wilburfan1521 on Dec 11, 2002 11:39:32 GMT 9.5
Anyone who wants to add me:
conway1981@hotmail.com
Looking forward to chatting to u!
Bec xxx
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nicski
Junior Member
Posts: 59
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Post by nicski on Dec 11, 2002 12:56:50 GMT 9.5
Same goes for me: killa_chick@hotmail.com Pretty embarrassing name but i made it up over 3 years ago in year 11, so that sorta excuses it
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Post by butterflybabe17 on Jan 9, 2003 20:03:26 GMT 9.5
Hey all hope u dont mind me posting on here cos the doggies are my first team but port are my second well if anyone wants to add me to their msn they are more than welcome to so here it is.
My Fave boys from port are Monty,Dewy,Nicky Stevens,Koula,K.Cornes and the two new vic boys Salopek and Gilham.
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Post by powerfan on Jan 9, 2003 20:32:03 GMT 9.5
We do not mind butterflybabe17
Hi to you
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